Things I have said ABOUT poultry

 A freight train could go by five feet from the coop and the ducks wouldn't care as long as it happened at the same time every day. But if I wear a new hat they loose their little minds.

Drakes are gross. Just don't think about it too hard and do not google it.

I once used a different color bedding in the duck hut and they were pretty sure it was going to eat them.

Chickens lack empathy. It's just how God made them.

It's not their fault they're stupid, their wild ancestors got by on fear and rage instead.

There are too many perfectly nice roosters in the world to put up with a human aggressive one. CROCKPOT.

A list of things I have said to poultry

 "Stop that! It's not his fault he exists and has testicles!"

"There has been too much duck crime today! No more crime until tomorrow!"

"I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE"

"TAKE IT TO THE HOUSE" (almost every day, when I want them to go back in the damn coop)

"STOP EATING MY TREES THEY ARE BABIES"

"Capes are not in fashion! Get out of the feed sacks!"

"WHERE DID YOU GET THAT"

"YOU DISGUST ME"

"That's not where eggs go!"

"STOP POOPING ON ME I'M TRYING TO HELP YOU OW YOU HAVE SHARP TALONS"

"Stop shouting and eat your food!"

"Who's blood is this?!"

"Puddle water is not delicious! I just filled the waterer!"